Most pressing issue: I don’t understand why people love football and the super bowl. Personally, I like super bowl Sunday because it provides an excuse to purchase Sun Chips and make homemade jalapeno poppers with vegetarian bacon (tradition). But people get SO into it! Not to be a Debbie Downer or anything, but the ease with which people become passionate about a sporting event, but not, say, the social problems (health care access for example) facing our country, sort of disturbs me.
The healthcare issue is on the forefront of my mind because I feel like I’ve gotten really amazing care during this pregnancy. Yet, I have literally paid under $100 so far for hours upon hours of many health care professionals’ time over the past 8 months. This culminated in a total hypochondriac move on my part this past week that I shall not detail out of utter embarrassment, but needless to say, it involved so much additional monitoring/care and at the end I paid absolutely nothing (out of pocket for me. I realize that money is taken elsewhere, which is part of my discomfort). How can this be a functioning system? People can’t get stitches without paying extravagant fees (Once, when I was uninsured, I paid $150 for 5 stitches in my finger. This was around 2001. Who knows how much it would cost now?), yet I am paying next to nothing for much more sophisticated care. The cost in total to have a baby is going to be $300. WTF? I sort of feel like this can’t actually be real. What an amazing and supportive country we would have if it were like this for everyone! Can you imagine! People might not be so tightly wound and afraid! They wouldn’t wait to seek medical care! Kids would be healthier and happier! It’s hard to know who to blame for this (wait, no it’s not).
In other news, I recently went down the internet rabbit hole of Carol Gilligan writings and interviews. She is totally worthy of hero status in my book. I read her when I was a freshman in college, but of course, no one really learns things deeply at that age, so I wasn't able to appreciate her then. Clearly, some of what she stands for must have seeped in to make me the person I am today, but not in a conscious way. All of this thinking about education and sex-separated schools had me revisiting her (encouraged by my beloved's recitation of her thesis in "In a Different Voice": girls and boys have different moral compasses (caring vs. justice)) today. Quite frankly, it's serendipitous as I'm about to embark on the journey that is rearing a boy. Her view of feminism is so right on--she thinks it's a movement to "free democracy from patriarchy". Her argument is that both men and women start to view some forms of communication (namely rational discussion removed from emotion) as better than others (she thinks it starts around 4 in boys and 8-10 in girls). Girls look back at themselves when they were nine as being "stupid" because of how emotionally honest they were.
"It’s a system of oppression that cuts off everyone from parts of themselves. It makes a line between men and women, and between men and boys, between men and children, between some men and other men."
As a person who is "raw" "emotional" "open", it took me SOOO long to know that it is OK. Going to a school with many men who had long since cut themselves off from displaying or discussing emotions was hard, as they deem emotions as "crazy". Emotions/energy/openness = crazy. It's so ingrained in our culture! Repression of fiery personalities for women is seen as necessary to be "presentable". Look at TV and movies! The woman has "lost it", when she gives in by displaying her true feelings. Maybe this is part of the reason I am now obsessed with Mrs. Coach Taylor on FNL. She is emotional and strong and so clearly a balanced character who both gives to others and makes sure that in doing so she is not subverting a part of herself.
Anyway, CG believes that boys and girls ARE different, but it doesn't mean that they don't have aspects of the other gender. It's OK to admit that they have different ways of thinking, probably because of their brain chemistry or whatever, but what's damaging is shoving them so far to one side of the spectrum or another. It's also damaging that we value the two extremes of the spectrum as being appropriate for "boys" and "girls".
Plus, she's a mother of boys! Now it makes me excited to have the same sexed child as my hero! CG forever!
Side note: She taught at the U of C and refused to turn in grades when grades were used to determine who went to Vietnam. Amazing lady!
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