Inventions

I usually come up with a few completely self serving (and sometimes inconceivable, like a magical bike helmet that is not bulky, yet works much like oobleck-protecting with hard impact, but soft all other times) inventions a year. For example, a scrolling billboard for your car that allows you to write nasty messages to that guy who just cut you off. Or, the rolling trolley that restaurants can rent out to diners who’ve eaten a little too much, and would appreciate some help to the car (or home). Lately, however, I’ve been on fire with the (I think, objectively) good ideas.

1. “Suit Robe”. This is a robe that when worn properly, appears to be a suit. This invention came to me when my roommate/BFF recently opened the door, in his robe, at 3 pm, to talk to a delivery man--it just seemed so undignified. But what if the robe looked like a suit?! Totally dignified! And what about business men who need to have an international video conference call (does this even happen?) at ungodly hours? Now there is a solution! Wake up and put on your suit robe! “Suit up for those late night business meetings!” Functional and ironic at the same time.

2. This invention isn’t really one. It’s more like a “business plan”, or better yet, a “way to further capitalize on the power of branding”. It’s called a “small mall”. Basically it’s like a neighborhood convenience store, except with brand name kiosks on the inside with small stuff, like socks, belts, perfume. The power of small malls is that they are ubiquitous. Down every block, there will exist a corner store, filled with Gap socks, Old Navy dog toys, Banana Republic headbands…..It’s kind of like an upscale convenience store, but only for small items. Think of the possibilities---tweens could easily run their babysitting money down to their local small mall to purchase a pair of earrings or socks! Disney could have a kiosk for every brand! Hannah Montana, HSM, Selena Gomez (I have no idea what she’s in, just that she’s the new Miley). Anyone could easily buy nice trouser socks on the way to work!

Here's a picture of our kitchen window. I'm going to call the purchase of that circular-image-repeater (on clearance) the best one of 2008. Every morning I go into the kitchen, look outside 19 different times and my heart is filled with joy!