sophie giraffe

So I guess it’s becoming more and more certain that we will have a new, tiny little roommate in a few months. Although he won’t pay rent for at least another 16 years, I’m still pretty excited about it. The decision to have a baby feels quite haphazard and impulsive. I mean, there are so many rational reasons NOT to have one (overpopulation and the environment, the stress of modern life, too old, happiness levels might decrease according to many studies, the emotional damages from facebook, etc.) and one overarching reason TO have one (biological imperative), that in the end, one can’t help but feel a bit of educated woman guilt with the decision. This is not to say that I also don’t feel incredibly lucky to be able to actually have a child at the shriveled up old age of 34 but still, it’s not quite as easy a decision as it is when one is young and naïve.

Notes about pregnancy so far:
--Before I even met my obstetrician, I was handed a pamphlet on genetic testing at the registration desk. At that point, I wasn't even sure what in the world was happening to my body, and it really rattled me to be handed a leaflet containing information about things that could be wrong with the baby (a "leaflet of worry"). Little did I know that this was just the beginning of various tests/scans that literally drive one to the brink of insanity. The medical care received during pregnancy seems to focus on one essential question: What's wrong with your baby? All of the medical establishment focus on potential problems makes ME obsess about them as well.

--It's weird being 34 and sitting next to a 20 year old in my first pre-natal class. Quick math confirmed that I was indeed old enough to be a grandmother, had I made different life choices.

--I never knew I would turn into one of THOSE people--totally paranoid and obsessive about pregnancy, which might be related to point the fact that I never knew that I could find such pleasure in spending hours on the babycenter.com forums.

--The fact that the first trimester utterly sucks came as a total shock. I'm glad it occurred when I was not working because otherwise I might have quit my job.

Some first trimester highlights:
--nausea at the mere thought of many delightful things, including gelato, eggs, pasta, water
--needing >14 hours of sleep a night
--not able to read books
--only capable of sitting, staring and sleeping
--barely forming sentences
--not wanting to talk to or touch another human being (including hello and handshakes)

On the bright side, now my mom has someone with undiscriminating taste to shop for!

Things I have purchased so far for the baby:
1. New shower curtain with the alphabet and cute animals on it

2. Charley Harper posters (2)

3. Sophie giraffe (#1 baby toy on amazon)

4. 6-12 month tardis onesie (NWB is a Dr. Who fan)

I THINK I’M READY.

(What’s that you say? None of those things are actual baby necessities? You mean I might need things like a thermometer and baby wipes and a stroller? Doesn’t a baby come with those things?)